When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done

I quickly wanted to say no until I thought about it. I don’t know if my time ended right now that I’ve done more than I said. Or should I say, I talked about doing things more than I actually did do things. It’s mainly because I seek comfort and predictability. Though I want to be successful, I find myself some times nervous or concerned about taking that chance. Especially after I’ve been burned a few times (very few, but still.)

I think I get too caught up in the dreaming of what could have happen. I find myself dreaming and fearing about the best and the worst things that could happen. I get lost in my head sometimes. Well a lot.

If I’m blessed to get more time on this earth, I will accomplish more than I dreamt or talked about. But I’m going to have to come up with some goal oriented ways of doing more.

One way of doing this is to put more focus on getting what I want. I know what and where I want to be. I shouldn’t be focused on staying comfortable or secure I’m there. So every step I take forward from here on out needs to get me closer to being there.

Another way is to always take a chance a risk. I believe doing nothing is a risk. But you have to take a chance to improve yourself. You might fail, yes. But you might succeed. And if you can learn from your mistakes, it’s only a matter of time before you do succeed.

Lastly, I have to never settle with being comfortable. This is a lot like taking risk. I admit I could get really relaxed and find reasons to stay where I am. Or I’ll get frustrated in the search for “stability.” I have to remind myself that nothing in my life has been “stable.” Sure I’ve had long periods of time with predictable and no drama. Those times had little or not growth either.

Must be doin’ somethin’ right

I’ve always been very fortunate to be confident in myself, in my identity, in knowing who I am, to be able to know what it is that I love. And to not be ashamed or embarassed by it.

I love to learn. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a class, if I sit in on a lecture, if I read a book or watch a youtube video, or even just watch a quiz show on TV… learn something new every day goes the saying and that’s something I fully believe in.

I’m also lucky enough to work in the education field, to work with bright, inquisitive minds that also want to learn. I’m blessed to be able to help guide these young people, to help them find their way and their passion.

I’m one of those frustratingly annoying people (This is what E tells me) who gets up early and jumps out of bed, excited to go to work. I probably put in more hours than the average person, but it’s so easy to do because the work day just zooms right by. I happily lose track of the world and time, losing myself in the task at hand.

Work is not work as many people refer to it, but something that is fun and interesting and exciting. It’s not just a job to me but a passion.

Birth Order and IQ

I recently re-read an old NY Times article which claimed that eldest children have higher IQs.

The study found an average of a 3 point difference in IQ, when other factors relating to IQ were factored out (stuff like the parents’ educational attainment, family size, etc.). The study was done in Norway, based on IQs of men born between 1967 and 1976, measured when they were 18 or 19 years old. They even compared first borns with children who were second born but became the eldest after a death in the family. These “eldests” still had higher IQs.

I’m not Norwegian. I wasn’t born between 1967 and 1976. I’m not male.

I will admit, I’m an eldest. I have one little sister, and I’m pretty sure she has a higher IQ than me (if SAT scores are any predictor). Yes, I had the benefit of having my mother’s sole undivided attention for the first 3 years of my life. Yes, I remember teaching my little sister multiplication right after I learned it in third grade. (So ironic that she’s a mathematician.) Did that make me smarter? Maybe, maybe not. But guess what? I’m happy with my life, high IQ or not. Doesn’t that count for anything any more?

I’m pretty sure that when I have more children, yes, they will get treated differently than my first born. I can imagine being slightly less paranoid with my subsequent children. But, I don’t think I’ll give them any less attention or stimulation or love. Yes, my older children will probably get to help out with the younger ones. But will that give them higher IQ scores? Does it matter? Maybe I don’t want to raise cautious children (typically, eldest children). Maybe I want to raise risk-takers (typically, younger children).

How do you think this plays out in your family?