Reasons I am rich

With all the atrocities happening in the world around us, sometimes it’s easy to get bogged down in the fear, the anger, the hatred, the uncertainty. To get so lost in others pain. Sometimes it’s important to keep things in perspective.

I won’t go to sleep hungry tonight.
I won’t go to sleep outside tonight.
I had a choice of what clothes to wear this morning.
I have access to clean drinking water.
I have access to medical care.
I have access to the Internet.
I am literate and numerate.
I have the right to vote.
I have family who love me

These all seem such simple things but there are people out there who have nothing, who would give everything for just one of those things. I need to take a step back and realise that really, I am blessed.

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Things that make me irrationally angry

  • People who assume I’m good at maths because I’m Asian
  • Getting stuck behind someone who walks really slowly
  • Stubbing my toe!
  • People who try to talk to me when they can clearly see I’m on the phone
  • Illegible CAPTCHA spam filters
  • My husband putting empty cartons back in the fridge

All of those have happened to me today. Some of them multiple times, even! Wednesday, why do you hate me so?

I feel a little better for being able to get some of that off my chest. It’s now evening and I can relax!

What makes you irrationally angry?

What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world

I would readdress the balance, the division of resources and power between everyone, not just the 1%.
I want to live in a world, want my daughter to grow up in world, where everyone is equal.
A world where everyone has a home, has enough food, has clothing and earns a livable wage.
A world where everyone has access to affordable – if not free – education and medical care.

A little socialist? A little idealistic?
Maybe, yes.
I want to believe in a political system where all people in society contribute to the production of goods and services and that those goods should be shared equally. And a world where this happens is

Sadly, this is not a world or a system that I live in and so I must continue to to balance my ideals with my situation, to educate myself and my family on the best ways to conduct ourselves in a world that is unfair

When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done

I quickly wanted to say no until I thought about it. I don’t know if my time ended right now that I’ve done more than I said. Or should I say, I talked about doing things more than I actually did do things. It’s mainly because I seek comfort and predictability. Though I want to be successful, I find myself some times nervous or concerned about taking that chance. Especially after I’ve been burned a few times (very few, but still.)

I think I get too caught up in the dreaming of what could have happen. I find myself dreaming and fearing about the best and the worst things that could happen. I get lost in my head sometimes. Well a lot.

If I’m blessed to get more time on this earth, I will accomplish more than I dreamt or talked about. But I’m going to have to come up with some goal oriented ways of doing more.

One way of doing this is to put more focus on getting what I want. I know what and where I want to be. I shouldn’t be focused on staying comfortable or secure I’m there. So every step I take forward from here on out needs to get me closer to being there.

Another way is to always take a chance a risk. I believe doing nothing is a risk. But you have to take a chance to improve yourself. You might fail, yes. But you might succeed. And if you can learn from your mistakes, it’s only a matter of time before you do succeed.

Lastly, I have to never settle with being comfortable. This is a lot like taking risk. I admit I could get really relaxed and find reasons to stay where I am. Or I’ll get frustrated in the search for “stability.” I have to remind myself that nothing in my life has been “stable.” Sure I’ve had long periods of time with predictable and no drama. Those times had little or not growth either.

If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?

The first and most obvious reason why we do things we don’t like is responsibility, and responsibility is quickly followed by necessity. More often than not the obligations and commitments that come with responsibility are not fun or something anyone likes to do, but they are a necessary part of survival. Necessity and responsibility are the foundation for sustainability and growth; if there is no regard for the latter, self preservation and survival are virtually impossible.

In a world where nothing is free or handed to us it takes work to survive. The more effort and time that must go into maintaining survival means less time available to be spent on doing the things we actually enjoy doing.

Almost all of the wonderful things we would prefer to be doing at any given moment cost money. In order to do these things, we must not only be able to afford to do them, but be able to afford the time it takes to do them. Usually that means doing things we would prefer not to do, in exchange for the compensation and freedom required to do the things we want to do.

The system was built around the idea that, for the masses, the cost of living and the cost of doing the things we want to do, will always be greater than the rewards for doing the things we would rather not do. This ever growing disparity ensures most of us will spend the majority of our time consumed by things we would otherwise not do, just to survive. In order to do each and every thing, beyond survival, that we would like to do, it requires us to sacrifice even more time doing undesirable things. This creates a self sustaining cycle that is virtually unbreakable.

It’s easy to see how this cycle can lead to the procrastination of the things we want to do most in life to an undetermined time in a better future. A future where we have already been rewarded for sacrificing our time.

Unfortunately, for most people that day never comes

Which is worse, failing or never trying?

As well as being one of the 50 Questions That Will Free You Mind which I plab to answer as part of my 101 Things In 1001 Days challenge, this is something I have talked about many times with Tae.

I am sure most of us have the answer to this question within us. Definitely never trying is worse than failing. We do so many things throughout our lives. We take up a number of initiatives, a number of tasks. There are so many opportunities that knock our door. We give a try to some of them, we fail in some and we even succeed in some.

We all want to succeed in our lives, in our endeavors. And we succeed only when we understand the case scenario completely. Failure should be seen as an opportunity to understand, to learn, to grow. And you can fail only when you give a try. Many details are so minute that you come to know only when you analyze the reasons for your failure. Hence, failure here becomes your answer to how you can win and again, to find this answer to your success, you need to TRY.

Those who are not trying are actually stopping themselves from exploring their own potential and capabilities. When you try, you understand the areas on which you need to work on. You understand the areas which are your strong points. Using these strong points and skills, you can achieve great heights in any task. Also, when you try you understand your weaknesses and I need not explain that you can work upon your weakness only when you actually know that you have such a weakness and that can be known only by TRYING.

Thus the conclusion and answer to this question is that Never Trying is Worse Than Failing. It is because by not giving a try, you are creating a boundary for yourselves by not letting yourself to explore your potential. Failing is a good thing as it helps you find the answer or the reasons to your failure and that will not only help you succeed in that particular task but also prevents such failures in future. Also, when you fail, you try out a number of other options to succeed. And exploring those other options is in turn a learning process.

help!

i’m at a loss here for what to do.

on the weekends, tae doesn’t like to go out. she prefers to stay home and hang out with me. for the past three weekends, we have gone out in the car exactly TWO times. she is ok with walking to gymnastics and going to get coffee, but other than that, she apparently loathes going out. she has me only slightly wrapped around her little finger – what am i supposed to do when she says, “i just want to stay here and hang out with you because i looove you!”

so that’s the first problem – i don’t know how to get her out of the house on the weekends. my hunch is that i need to plan ahead more, build in more routines – since she is fine going to gymnastics on sundays, and she is fine leaving the house during the week.

here’s the second problem – she doesn’t nap. she has never really napped without going out in the car or in the stroller. so yesterday, after giving her 30 minutes to mentally prepare, we left for the grocery store. and as we drove home, she started to zone out, and by the time we got home at 4pm, she was conked out.

napping at 4pm is always kind of awkward, so i decided to give it a shot and tried to wake her up at 6pm. i offered her snacks, playing, music, everything… and she just faded right back to sleep, and finally asked for her pajamas at 7:30pm.

this was not a good sign. i got in bed around 10:30pm, anticipating an early morning. but nothing could have prepared me for what happened at 2:45am. 2:45am (mind you, this is after she had me up fetching her food between 1:30am and 2:30am – this is always a precursor to waking up for her.)

“mommy, i want to get up. mommy, come play!”

next, i feel little hands under my neck and back – she was trying to physically lift me up. next, she is smothering me with kisses. “mommy, it’s wake up time.”

that was at 3:00am. she read to her self for about 20 minutes (oh the irony, in my semi-delusional state, i heard her reciting “don’t let the pigeon stay up late!”), and then played around with my ipod for another 10. and at 3:30am, she was up, and i was up.

after playing for 4 hours, she was ready to go to school at 7:30am. her teacher was a little surprised to see us, since we typically arrive at like 9:00am.

i am so wide awake now, but we’ll see how i am at 3pm. YAWN.